Love Triangles And Its Confusing Complications

Love triangles are confusing affairs. Find out how love triangles work, how you could end up falling into one and how you can get out of one here.

Have you ever been in love with someone who’s already in love with someone else?

Or are you in love with someone right now, but find yourself falling for someone else at the same time?

Well, you’re just living the perfect love triangle life!

What is a love triangle?

A love triangle is a complicated dating scenario where there’s love in the air, but there are more than two people involved.

When love is mutual and shared between two people, everything is perfect, simple and easy.

But when a third person enters the picture, everything changes just like that.

In come the complications and the frustrations, laced with intense happiness and a flow of bitterness.

The two types of love triangles

There are two primary types of love triangles. There are many complicated love triangles too, but they always find a way to fit into these two scenarios.

#1 Two people trying to win one person’s affection.

#2 One person who’s in love with one person but likes someone else at the same time.

How would you find yourself in a love triangle?

If you have a crush on someone who’s already in a relationship, that doesn’t become a love triangle. It stays as a crush.

And if you’re in a perfectly happy relationship and your friend tells you they’re in love with you, that’s not a love triangle either, because your friend just has a crush on you.

A love triangle starts only when there is reciprocation.

When a single person starts to feel a reciprocating connection with someone who’s already dating, or if you’re in a relationship with one person and start loving someone else who reciprocates your love, it has the perfect recipe for a love triangle.

Only with reciprocation does a motive to pursue arise. After all, if you liked someone and that person didn’t care about you, there’s nothing at all that you can do, is there?

It doesn’t matter if you’re in a relationship or you’re single, what you need to realize is that love triangles can never ever be created because of one person’s weak moment. It always takes two people to start the complication while the third person suffers for no fault of theirs.

No one wants to be in a love triangle

And yet, almost all of us end up in one. A love triangle may start off as an interesting distraction at first, which then unexpectedly turns into love. And this can lead to sticky love triangles where one person could be in love with two people at the same time.

When you don’t want to take a step ahead, nor do you want to take a step back and stay happy in your own relationship, a love triangle starts to form even if you try your best to avoid it.

Love triangles always affect a relationship negatively

For the person who’s single, it’s simple. All they need to do is steal the person who’s already in the relationship.

If you’re single and trying to steal someone who’s in an unhappy relationship, it’s really easy. But what do you do if they’re with someone they really love? They may love you and yet, they may not want to lose their own partner. You may be able to steal a few happy moments of love and lust, but if nothing really works out, you can still walk away with your share of pain and helplessness.

On the other hand, a person who loves two people will want the best of both people, and the worst of none. They’d start picking flaws in their partner and creating false reasons to justify why they’re cheating. They need a reason to convince themselves that they’re not happy in the relationship, and that’s the only reason they’re falling for someone else or getting involved in a love triangle.

But even when the third person walks away from their life someday, can they ever overcome all the flaws they’ve picked in their relationship?

Unless there’s a lot of love and bonding in the relationship, a love triangle always leaves a deep scar that tests the person’s faith in the relationship.

And almost always, a relationship that is put to the test of a love triangle fails or never regains its former glory.

Love triangles are painfully fun

If you’re involved in a love triangle right now, you would know this. A love triangle is a lot of fun for the cheating partner and the third person because it’s so exciting and risky. When you enjoy the pleasures of a love triangle, it’s always fun.

But for your partner who’s in the dark, it may be a very miserable time because you’re ignoring them, detaching yourself emotionally from them, and completely avoiding them.

And once the fire and the passion of your secret affair start to die down and you realize that you still love your partner and not this third person *which almost always happens*, you’d start to feel the pain too.

So what do you really get out of a love triangle? Nothing but pain, even if it feels like fun while it lasts.

Love triangles are selfish

You may think it’s acceptable for you to love someone else behind your lover’s back. But would you be fine if your partner behaved exactly like you, used the same flirty words you use with your adulterous lover, with someone they like? If that bothers you, you’re being very unfair to your partner and you’re being selfish.

I know you feel helpless, but you really need to keep this in mind. Most lovers who are stuck in love triangles forget to think from their partner’s point of view now and then. By keeping your partner in mind, even if you do fall for someone else, you’ll always know who’s more important at the back of your mind. And that guilt will help give you the strength to walk away even if you’ve rolled in the hay with someone else for a few weeks.

Love triangles are inevitable

Let’s face it. We can’t always stop ourselves from appreciating someone else or falling for someone else helplessly. But a love triangle is best avoided.

It can happen when you least expect it. You may just enjoy a conversation with someone, and without realizing it, a few weeks later, you may be in love with them because they excite you and have infatuated you. Don’t hate yourself if that happens to you. Just learn to do the right thing.

But if you ever do experience a love triangle, instead of picking flaws in your own relationship, ask yourself whom you’d really choose, and who you want to be with. Just one answer. Don’t try to push that thought away. You have no choice because someday you’re going to have to decide on that. And the earlier you make up your mind, the less painful it’ll be for everyone involved.

A love triangle starts only when you’re confused over your emotions for your partner. If you’re certain about who you’re truly in love with, you’ll never have a weak moment even if you just enjoy a flirty conversation with a flirty someone outside your relationship.

You don’t need to be wary of everyone you talk to or avoid ever getting friendly with anyone of the opposite sex. All you need to remember is how happy you already are in your perfect relationship. Just keeping that in mind will safeguard you from ever sliding down the exciting and dark hole of love triangles.

If you’re experiencing a love triangle or wondering how to get over one, it doesn’t make you a bad person. It only makes you human.

via LovePanky - the best dating site for sexy, successful singles! – the best dating site for sexy, successful singles!


Why Are You Bored With Your Relationship?

You don’t need to feel guilty if you’re getting bored with your relationship. You just need to understand why you’re bored and do something about it!

Relationships are tricky places to be in.

Sometimes, it makes you feel like the happiest person in the world.

And at other times, it spirals you back onto the ground and makes you wonder if you even want to be in one.

Do you feel like you’re getting bored with your relationship?

You’re not the only person with those thoughts on your mind, so you really don’t have to feel guilty about it, even if your lover is head over heels in love with you.

Sometimes, these things just happen.

But should it come as a surprise to you if you get bored in love?


Almost always, boredom sets into a relationship because you didn’t do anything to prevent it.

Are you bored with your relationship?

You may be in love for a long time. For few, it may take months, and for many others, it may take a few years.

But at some inevitable point in your love life, you may wonder if you’re really actually happy being in the relationship.

So why does that happen? You didn’t plan on falling out of love, but it just happened. You wake up one morning and you’re just not interested in staying in love anymore. You could push the thought aside and continue on in your relationship, or you could jump into an affair with someone sexy and fun. You could do any of those, and more.

But before you actually go blaming love and its mysterious ways that led to the downfall of your present relationship, you need to ask yourself a few questions.

Why are you really bored? What do you want to do about it? And most importantly, what are the reasons behind why you got bored of your relationship?

Once you understand why you’re getting bored with your relationship, you can prevent it from ever happening again. And unless you truly understand the reasons behind the boredom, you’ll never really be able to enjoy a happy relationship without a bit of drama and boredom now and then.

15 reasons why you’re bored with your relationship

The reasons for your boredom could be one of these or all of them. If you can learn to eliminate these flaws or distractions from your life, you’d surely be able to overcome the boredom and enjoy a perfect relationship.

#1 The daily routine.

#2 The frenzied excitement.

#3 The fragile foundation.

#4 Better opportunities.

#5 Emotional affairs.

#6 Sex is just boring.

#7 Special memories.

#8 Communication.

#9 Spontaneity.

#10 You miss being single.

#11 Shared goals and passions.

#12 Together time.

#13 Someone else excites you.

#14 Annoying partners.

#15 You’ve lost your life.

What do you do now that you’re bored with your relationship?

The answer is simple. What do you want to do? What’s the first solution your mind gives you? Do you want to fix it or do you want to move on?

Work hard towards a better relationship and fix it. Or talk to your partner and take a temporary break from each other.

You don’t have too many options here. If you’re bored with your relationship, it’s better to confront it now or both of you may end up hating each other and move towards a messy breakup in future

Use these 15 reasons why you’re bored with your relationship to understand your relationship boredom better. And once you know the cause, make up your mind on what you want to do next.

How To break Up With Someone You Met Online?

You’ve been online dating and made the decision to go out with you matches quickly after making contact. All the men you’ve met have been lovely, though none are really what you want. But because they’re so nice – and you want to be kind – you’ve seen them a few more times, even though you know you don’t want to date them long-term or sleep with them. It just seems so harsh to ditch them after one date. How can you tell them, without being too serious, that you’re not interested? You need a nice way out.

Put yourself in the position of those you’re dating. What would you prefer – someone thanking you for a date but making it clear you won’t be seeing each other again? Or someone seeing you several more times out of a sense of duty, while you’re under the impression this could be going somewhere?

 If you liked them, then yes, it may be disappointing to know they’re not so keen on you. But at least you know it’s time to move on and either enjoy being single or look for others to date. Alternatively, if you weren’t too sure about them then knowing neither of you ‘clicked’ means, again, you can just move on.

Although you’re trying to be nice at the moment, what you’re doing is certainly not making you feel good – and it’s also unfair to the people you are dating.

You’re right that this doesn’t need to appear serious, nor is this the same as an established relationship breaking up.

How to end it?

As this is still very early days, email, text or phone are all appropriate ways of letting people know what’s going on. You can send a kind, short and specific message telling them what you feel – that you aren’t compatible or that this isn’t working for you. Also, let them know you don’t wish to waste their time, and that you wish them well.

Email, text or phone are all appropriate ways of letting people know what’s going on.

You may wish to prefix this by telling them you enjoyed the date or that you thought they were a nice person. This might suit some people, although it could also suggest uncertainty on your part, and leave them with unanswered questions – ‘if I’m so great, why isn’t she into me?’ or ‘maybe she’ll change her mind?’

If you’re feeling anxious about saying very clearly what you want to do, you may inadvertently create more stress by trying to soften the blow – doing ‘nice’ things like offering compliments, or getting drawn into conversations about your decision. Or even meeting up ‘as friends’ when it is clear they are hoping this is going to turn into something more.

That’s why a short, kind, but matter of fact answer is better. Leaving no suggestion you’re open to changing your mind and making it perfectly clear these are your choices you are quite happy to own without further debate.

While nobody likes rejection, knowing where you stand is better in the long run. In the early days of dating it’s sensible not to rush ahead, assume those you’re dating aren’t also dating others, and to make prompt decisions about who you want to see again.

So hopefully most people you are dating will accept your choice. And if they don’t – particularly if they keep trying to stay in touch after you’ve told them where they stand, or if they are unpleasant with you – then ensure you block them where you can on social media and have no further contact.

When to break the news

Say you’ve had a date, it was nice but not one you want to repeat. You could decide to let the person know soon after (perhaps the next day) that it was a pleasant afternoon/evening but you don’t want to repeat it.  Or you might want to wait until they get in touch to suggest another date when you can thank them but say this isn’t for you.

While it may be tempting to leave it to them to get in touch, this puts the onus on them to do so (and they may be waiting on you). Plus it takes away from a more assertive approach you want to aim for – which is being unashamedly straightforward about what you want.

What not to do

An alternative response to the one you’ve described is just to disappear from their life altogether.

Known as ‘ghosting’ this is often done to avoid any awkward conversations. But it leaves the other person feeling uncertain and rejected. And rather than ending contact it can mean they keep trying to reach you – just to find out what’s happened and if they did anything wrong.

If you’ve told them right away there won’t be other dates, you don’t have to discuss it further. But you do need to tell them something.

Personally me, usually say nothing or ‘Sorry, no!’ People react differently, but I don’t really care. It is better than waste your time on useless dating.

via LifestyleWoman

Why is Inner Beauty More Important Than Outer Beauty?

Is inner beauty something that ugly people say to themselves to feel better? Find out the real truth about inner beauty that’ll reveal another side.

Inner beauty is such a misnomer if you give it a second consideration.

What is inner beauty even supposed to mean anyway?

Is it a kind of beauty that’s on the inside?

So is that something we can never see, and only imagine?

Inner beauty isn’t just inner beauty. As you dwell on the idea for a while, you’ll realize that inner beauty is the only beauty there is.

I’m not trying to say that outer appearances don’t matter.

All I’m saying is that inner beauty plays a much bigger part even in first sight than you think.

What is inner beauty all about?

By definition, inner beauty may be described as something that’s experienced through a person’s character rather than by appearances.

It’s the real beauty of a person that goes far beyond just physical appearances.

To most people, inner beauty is a joke. People say that inner beauty is something ugly people say to themselves to feel better. Of course, that makes perfect sense too. I mean, if you can’t see it, who can really tell whether it even exists in the first place?

The real truth about inner beauty and all its confusions

You may assume that inner beauty is something you can only feel and never see. But how true is that? There’s a big confusion between outer beauty and inner beauty, and in all that confusion, we’ve overlooked the true effort of inner beauty and given all the credit to outer beauty.

You may assume that you never notice inner beauty at first sight. But is that really true? Almost all the time, you notice a person’s physical appearance only for a moment, until the real inner beauty starts the attraction game.

You may speak to someone for a minute and find them pleasant or not-so-pleasant at first. But as the conversation goes on for a minute or two, you may start to pick qualities and traits, and without even realizing it, you may start to find a person more and more beautiful or charming.

What makes attractive people so attractive?

You may think it’s a chiseled face or a gorgeous physique that makes a person attractive. But more than anything else, it’s a person’s inner belief that they’re attractive that makes them more appealing to others.

It’s true, physical appearances can be a bonus, but it’s something that’s easily overlooked when other traits are brought into the picture.

The glow of confidence and sex appeal comes from within yourself. Some of the most fancied personalities like Oprah, Lady Gaga or Tom Hanks aren’t really the prettiest of people. But their glowing confidence and self-belief make them attractive to every member of the opposite sex.

Even Shrek the ogre seems loveable and nice once you get to know him, don’t you think?

First impressions don’t always depend on your physique or your facial features, but you need to believe that from within yourself. And that’s where your true beauty lies.

Are you beautiful on the inside?

Inner beauty helps you appreciate outer beauty. If you love, appreciate and feel good about yourself, you would feel more confident about facing and interacting with other beautiful people in the world. Remember, outer beauty can give you a glance, it’s inner beauty that makes someone stay.

Is beauty really in the eye of the beholder?

I personally believe that beauty isn’t really in the eye of the beholder. I think beauty is within ourselves. What others see when they look at us is a projection of what we want them to see.

When you fill your thoughts with positive energy and inner beauty, you’d appreciate the things that are around you a lot more too. Even when you look at an inanimate object like a painting, or even a view of the ocean, it seems more beautiful to you because you see the beauty that overflows within you reflect in everything else around you.

If you feel beautiful, your own self-belief and confidence bring out a glow of beauty that no outer beauty can compete with. But if you feel ugly, your inner beauty will reflect the same idea and project it on your outer beauty. If you truly feel beautiful on the inside, you’d never seem unappealing to anyone else.

Yes, it’s true that some people may want a 36-24-36 body in their partner or never ending legs, but that’s only a preference. Just like how some girls see wealth as an important criterion when it comes to dating a guy, it’s all just a preference. And you really need to understand that from within.

Inner beauty can be seen by everyone else

And it’s so much more beautiful than outer beauty. So what if you’re several pounds overweight, or short or bald? Truly believe in yourself. But if you seem unconvinced that you’re truly beautiful, start working on what you perceive as flaws about yourself.

Flaws are perceptive and it’s a flaw only because you believe it’s one. A girl who wants to lose 10 pounds may think she’s fat, while another girl who wants to be size zero may think she’s fat. To a third girl’s eye, both those girls may already be skinny! Beauty is just a perception that begins from within.

Just look at Nigella Lawson, she’s so pretty, flirty and gorgeous, that no one would even notice that she’s not exactly skinny! Any guy would be willing to date her in a flash. If that’s not the power of inner beauty, perception and self-confidence, really, then what is?!!

The real beauty that everyone sees

If inner beauty is the true beauty that everyone sees, why is it even called inner beauty? Shouldn’t it just be called outer beauty then because that’s what everyone notices anyway?

Well, a better word would be just beauty, there’s nothing inner or outer about it.

You’re beautiful if you believe you’re beautiful. You’re attractive if you feel attractive. Everyone only sees you as a projection of what you see when you look into the mirror.

You’re beautiful if you know it and feel it. So go on out there, because there’s a whole world waiting for the beautiful you. And if you still feel like there’s a flaw holding the beautiful you back, learn to overcome it.

At the end of the day, call it what you want, inner beauty or outer, there’s just one kind. And it’s the kind of beauty you see when you look into the mirror.

How to Manage Your Expectations in a Relationship

Got burned by a partner’s poor understanding of your relationship expectations before? Here’s how to avoid the same problem in the future.

One of the main reasons that relationships so often break down – whether a business, personal or romantic relationship – is that expectations on both sides of the fence can be mismatched. So often the relationship battle cry of, “you’ve changed, you’re not the person I fell in love with!” is executed at the break-up stage.

The truth is, though, that no one has changed at all. During the honeymoon period, everyone tries to be the ideal man or woman, in order to keep their intended another half interested, and what actually happens is that those accused of changing are, in fact, just reverting back to their old selves.

Which expectations?

Expectations within a relationship are many and varied. The term doesn’t just refer to what time to expect your dinner on the table, or what time your significant other is expected back from work, although these are aspects of relevant expectation umbrellas.

There are so many subtle variations when it comes to relationship expectations that often, we don’t think of them that way at all. First of all, though, your expectations reflect what you want out of a relationship and how they relate to your partner.

The whole truth, and nothing but the truth

This is the key to any management of expectations in any arena. Everyone is tempted to be a little bit whiter than white, the first time they meet up with someone whom they are attracted to. And there’s nothing wrong with wanting to make a positive impression.

However, what you don’t want to happen is for the object of your desires to fall in love with someone else – i.e. the person you are desperately trying to be, but actually aren’t. All you do in that case is invite them to fall OUT of love with you at a later date.

The most common relationship expectation blunders

So where do these relationship expectation blunders most commonly occur, and when are they at their most hindering? Just read on for the most common blunder areas to be avoided.

#1 Speech. Some people are tempted to completely change their speech patterns and behaviors when dating someone for the first time. They will often pretend to be a different social category, using upper-class pronunciation and phraseology.

However, there’s bound to be a point in the relationship when your other half will identify this particular fraud, making you look a bit silly, and not a little bit untrustworthy.

#2 Appearance. Of course, you should look your best, but don’t try to be something you’re not through the clothes you choose when you’re courting the object of your desires. You can be just as smart in casual clothes as you can in formal if you make an effort, and it’s better to let them see you as you normally are.

Plus, with guys and gals both, it’s usually pretty obvious when they’re squeezing into something different from what they usually wear, running the risk of looking like a walrus squeezed into a penguin costume.

#3 Romance. Again, nothing wrong with a few romantic gestures in the early stages of a relationship, but it’s important not to set yourself up for a fall. What’s the use of attending the first few dates complete with a dozen red roses, conveyed upon a horse and trap, when six months down the line, the most your other half can expect is Chinese takeout and a pat on the backside? This is not a surefire route to future relationship success.

#4 Sex. It’s a confident person who can easily boast at the beginning of being a master or mistress of the bedroom arts. That’s a big reputation to live up to. If you start well, but eventually peter off to your usual sex drive level, leaving your significant other hanging in the bedroom, while you watch the latest edition of your favorite TV program, things will not progress smoothly.

Be honest about these things, or don’t mention them at all. It’s better to be pleasantly surprised than frustratingly disappointed.

#5 Career. Avoid boasting about your career and inflating your position at all costs. There are three reasons for this. Firstly, if you commit to that particular fib, then you’re going to have to live a lifestyle that reflects it. Spending big all the time is likely to break your bank balance before you can break your romantic interest.

Secondly, it’s bound to catch up with you. You will, at some point, bump into friends or colleagues, and the truth will come out, making you look dishonest and a bit pathetic.

Thirdly, if you go around telling tall stories about your job, you’re likely to attract the attentions of gold diggers – and they will NOT hang around once they know the truth.

#6 Sociability. Not everyone is a gregarious animal, and some people prefer to stay at home with their loved one’s company, a glass of something expensive, and a good movie. The other person may be happy with this, even if they aren’t inclined that way. Just make sure that you let them decide for themselves and don’t try to manipulate them into thinking you’re someone you’re not.

#7 Role. Gender roles are an important part of society, and each society’s approach to gender depends upon its own particular culture, with things such as religion, tradition, a level of progressiveness, etc. playing a big part in how this is perceived.

What is certain, though, is that each person in a relationship should have a matching idea of what that role should be, and neither of you should ever attempt to portray yourselves as anything else if that relationship is to survive in a healthy fashion.

#8 Money. Money is very important to some people, and others less so. What’s important, though, is that you each respect the boundaries concerning it. Don’t throw it around during the initial stages of the relationship, and make a big song and dance number about paying for everything or paying your own way, and then let the same thing become a source of resentment further down the line. It should be fairly obvious who is willing to pay for what. Cultural sensibilities also dictate much of this.

#9 Hygiene. We’ll keep this simple: if you turn up for a first date freshly scrubbed and washed, then extend this courtesy to the other person EVERY time. In fact, please extend that courtesy to the rest of us. Bad hygiene is NEVER acceptable.

#10 Space. Not the kind that Captain Kirk is interested in, but the kind that reflects how much time you wish or are willing to spend with someone else. Failing to manage this particular expectation is one of the most common reasons for relationship failure later down the line, especially as it is impossible to detect how much space someone requires during the dating stages.

Drop the topic into the conversation, and have a frank discussion about it. If one of you is a very needy person, but the other is far more reserved, then you need to identify this and agree on a way of dealing with it before progressing the relationship any further.

It may be uncomfortable ground, approaching relationship expectations with the latest object of your desires, but if you want it to last, then you’ve got to make sure that you’re being true to the real you.

Are You Being Used For Money In Your Relationship?

When you started dating this person, has your bank account been on a downward slope? See these signs to know if the one you like pays more attention to your bank balance more than your love?

#1 The user pays for the first dates and then expects you to pay for the next 30. Apparently, this is a sly technique that users like to use in order to guilt-trip you into paying for future dates. They’ll blatantly show how generous they are and how much they’re spending on you so you’ll do the same for them.

But the problem is that once they stop paying for dates, they’ll never start again. And the worst part is that future dates become increasingly more expensive than the first few ones they paid for!

#2 The user always has a sob story that only money can solve. Your new squeeze’s grandmother/sister/uncle/second cousin twice removed, borrowed some money from them to pay for the dental surgery and that’s why they’re broke. And the next week, you notice that they need money for an electrician, for a doctor’s appointment, for an ultrasound, to replace a faulty appliance, to take the dog to the vet, and a series of expenditures that they had never prepared for!

This can turn into a pattern when the user will always ask you for money, and the story behind it would be so heartbreaking that you’d just relent. But the worst part is that when you ask about the surgery or any of the other things you helped with financially, the user doesn’t seem to know what you’re talking about, or they always have a good story to change the topic to something else.

#3 Your arguments start and end with money. The user gives a fit when you refuse to pay for something. There doesn’t seem to be anything that would placate them aside from that thing they want you to pay for. In time, you’ll start to notice that the quick fix for your arguments is expensive jewelry, gadgets or a down payment for a car. Yikes!

You’ve probably tried more personalized and heartfelt ways of showing your love like love letters, office surprises or breakfast in bed. But it seems like the happiness of your significant other is directly proportional to the dent they leave on your bank account.

#4 The user is too proud of your possessions. Meeting your significant other’s friends is always a plus in our book. But you may notice that instead of being proud of your achievements and your qualities, the user highlights the fact that you have a fancy car, you live in the affluent part of town or you make six digits monthly!

#5 The user has expensive taste. There’s nothing wrong with the expensive taste. Some people are just used to that sort of thing. But it will start to get alarming when your dates are always in five-star hotels, fine dining restaurants and trips to exotic locations.

When you try to suggest a cozy little hole-in-the-wall with great homemade brews, your date raises an eyebrow and insists on going to the most expensive restaurants in the city.

#6 The user isn’t motivated to earn money. Maybe you dated your significant other for their sophistication and brains. But despite a diploma from a good college and the chops to succeed in their field, your partner doesn’t have the drive to work and earn their own money.

It seems like you’re feeding, clothing and housing someone who just wants to bask in your riches. On one hand, it may feel good that your partner needs you. But on the other hand, the dependence on your paycheck may be more than you can bear!

It definitely feels good to be needed. But when you’re needed only for what your body and your money can do, then it may be a sign that you’re dating the wrong person.

Do you see any of these signs you’re being used for money in your own relationship? Give yourself a break and find someone who sees you as more than a walking wad of cash.

New Relationship Advice to Have a Perfect Start

Have you just found yourself in a new relationship? Learn what matters in love right from the start using this new relationship advice and tips.

There’s nothing more exciting than a new relationship in love.

A new relationship brings with it a hope for good things and adds a bit of mystery that intrigues you to learn more.

As pee-inducing as a new relationship may be, you have to take it slow and play by the rules if you want to have a good relationship that can blossom over time into a perfect one.

Most young lovers rush into a new romance and want to know everything it has to offer within the first few days.

But entering a new relationship isn’t like tearing the wrapper off your Christmas present. You have to take your time to open the layers.

From a new relationship to a good relationship

In a seasoned relationship, keeping the excitement alive may seem like the biggest bummer. But in a new relationship, it’s learning to hold back the excitement that ends up distancing new lovers.

If you’ve just met a perfect partner and don’t want to ruin a perfect start, here are all the pointers you need to take it from a new relationship to a good relationship.

#1 Meet often, but not too often

When you’re in young love, you’d want to spend every waking minute with your sweetheart. It’s understandable, you’re obviously excited. But could you be pushing it too far?

Remember that new workout DVD you picked up some time ago? You were probably really excited at the beginning, but as the daily workout took more and more time out of your daily routine, you started getting annoyed by it. It’s the same story with love.

By meeting too often, you’re suddenly changing the lives of two individuals who have fallen in love. It may feel great for the first week or so, but eventually, your other commitments may pile up and one of you may end up getting annoyed with the other for taking too much time.

Go out on dates once or twice a week, and it’ll keep the love and excitement on a high for a long time. But if you’re both madly in love and can’t keep your hands off each other, then you’re excused to meeting each other more often, but with caution.

#2 Don’t get clingy

Just because you’re dating doesn’t mean you own each other. Shocking, yes, but it’s true. If you want to know how to have a good relationship from the beginning, learn to give each other space. Especially in a new relationship, you’re only dating each and don’t really need to know every little piece of information about each other. Right now, you’re only a small part of each other’s lives, so don’t give yourself more importance than you deserve.

#3 Don’t be lavish with your gifts

Your new lover may be running in your mind all day, but that doesn’t mean you should go overboard and buy something for your lover every time you see something nice while shopping.

Save the spending sprees for later when the relationship has grown over a solid foundation. If you do want to express your love with gifts, then pick something small, personal and inexpensive at first. Save the extravagant gifts when you know your new mate’s the one for you.

#4 Don’t push sex in too quickly

In every new relationship, the horny-o-meter pointer may go into overdrive, just like your love-o-meter. But that doesn’t mean you should try and coerce your partner into having sex with you on the first or second date.

Take it slow, and if both of you do end up having sex soon, so be it. But don’t try booking a hotel room or ask your new lover to slide over to the back seat for some heavy petting unless it happens without any preplanning. It could make your partner think you’re just in it for the sex and lead to loss of trust.

#5 Don’t get possessive

Possessiveness is never a good trait in a relationship. Possessiveness is a sign of insecurity and jealousy, and these are usually big red flags in any relationship, new or old.

Remember that you’re still in a new relationship and can’t order or even request your mate to avoid people or avoid going out by themselves. Even if you do feel jealous about your lover’s partying habits or the amount of time they spend with a group of friends, learn to suck it up and hold it in. Signs of jealousy and insecurity right at the beginning can end the relationship even before you know it.

#6 Accept each other’s habits

When you fall in love with someone new, you fall in love with a person who’s unique, not a splitting image of your dream lover. Instead of trying to change them to fit your requirements, learn to adjust to their habits. By restricting a lover or trying to change someone at the very beginning, you risk the chance of losing them forever.

Whether you’re in love or otherwise, you can’t really change someone’s personality. If you find your new lover incompatible, end the relationship instead of suffering a nervous breakdown due to frustrations or insecurities.

#7 You don’t have to say I-Love-You

Just because you’re in a relationship with your new lover, it doesn’t mean you have to start saying those “three magical words” to each other as soon as you decide to go out with each other.

By saying it out first, you’re subtly coercing your partner into saying it back. And whether your new love says it back or not, it’s only going to lead to awkwardness in the air because it’s all happening so fast. Take it slow and wait a while, maybe a month or so before you say it out loud.

#8 Don’t introduce your date to your friends too soon

When you’re in a new relationship, you’re still exploring each other and learning about each other. Don’t call your friends over when your new lover’s with you or plan a group date just to show off your new catch.

Though it’s not a bad thing to do, overwhelming your new lover with too much information at once can seem like too much, too fast.

And if you do meet a friend when you’re on a date, introduce your date by the name and don’t really get into details. Your friends would understand the relationship status. And you’d save your date from an awkward situation, especially if they haven’t made up their mind on your relationship status.

#9 Talk to each other

When you’re in a new relationship, the bodily exploration may be the high point of every date that ends in a cozy corner or in one of your beds. But that doesn’t really help create a good relationship. Communication does.

Try to sneak in a long conversation every now and then and learn about each other, likes, dislikes, interests and all. By doing this, it’ll help you figure the romantic compatibility and also help bring both of you closer to a level that’s beyond sexual attraction.

Understand the secret behind knowing how to have a good relationship right from the start by taking it slow and learning about your partner without overwhelming them at once. After all, a new relationship, as exciting as it may be, is still fragile and breakable.

via LovePanky